COUPLES COUNSELLING

What is the secret to a long and happy relationship?

What is the secret to a long and happy relationship?
How can you prevent your relationship from going sour?
Why is marriage sometimes so tough?
How often do you think what is the secret to a long and happy relationship?

Relationships can become tough when we don’t truly listen to each other, when we fail to listen with our hearts, and when we misunderstand what is being communicated. Relationships will go sour if we lose the capacity to heal our relationship and repair them as we go… When our negative experiences outweigh our positive experience relationships fail.

Repairing your relationship after an argument can be started by accepting that you are partially responsible for how the argument started and ended.

Being able to approach your partner in humility and concern and allowing your partner to let you know what it was like for them.

Apologizing for what you did that hurt your partner and that you are committed to do better and asking your partner to do the same.

What is the secret to a long and happy relationship?
We can help you to recover your relationship when it is going sour.
And we can work with you both to approach each other to repair your relationship after arguments and negative experiences.

How often do you think what is the secret to a long and happy relationship?

Relationships can become tough when we don’t truly listen to each other, when we fail to listen with our hearts, and when we misunderstand what is being communicated. Relationships will go sour if we lose the capacity to heal our relationship as we go… When our negative experiences outweigh our positive experiences…

What are the negative behaviours that can contribute to breakdown in a realationship?

Criticism: stating one’s complaints as a defect in one’s partner’s personality, i.e., giving the partner negative trait attributions. Example: “You always talk about yourself. You are so selfish.”
Contempt: statements that come from a relative position of superiority. Contempt is the greatest predictor of divorce and must be eliminated. Example: “You’re an idiot.”
Defensiveness: self-protection in the form of righteous indignation or innocent victim-hood. Defensiveness wards off a perceived attack. Example: “It’s not my fault that we’re always late; it’s your fault.
Stonewalling: emotional withdrawal from interaction. Example: The listener does not give the speaker the usual nonverbal signals that the listener is “tracking” the speaker.

According to Dr Gottman’s research in “the Love Lab” these “Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse” predict early divorcing – an average of 5.6 years after the wedding. Emotional withdrawal and anger predict later divorcing – an average of 16.2 years after the wedding. Changing those negative behaviours that predict divorce to more positive behaviours that predict success can significantly change the course of your relationship and make it better.

Do you have relationship difficulties? – Serge can help!

Are you finding that your relationship is not what you would like it to be? Do you find yourselves arguing the same argument over and over each time without any resolution?

Many couples’ relationships benefit from improving their communication skills and repair skills to resolve arguments and to soothe and to reach out to each other to heal and nurture their relationship. These are some of the skills that I can help a couple learn and develop, along with resolving whatever else may be standing in the way of a successful relationship.

Couples in a relationship often need some help to reconnect with each other. I can help you develop the Repair Skills that you need to reconnect with each other to find a more rewarding and satisfying relationship that you desire.

As each couple is individual I will work with you accordingly to assess your needs as a couple and help you resolve the issues that are preventing your relationship being what you desire.

Sometimes you need help to break unwanted patterns and find happiness. Together we can develop the resources that you need to create the relationship that you want.

I provide short term or long term counselling, coaching and psychotherapy for individuals and couples.

Contact me on 0401 143 368 or at info@shiretotalhealth.com.au to make an appointment to discuss how I can help you.

How can I help.

The secret to longevity in a relationship are Repair Skills.

Repair skills are the capacity to heal your relationship through the art of reaching out, knowing how to make things better, apologizing, soothing…

I have many years’ experience in helping couples overcome difficulties and rescue their relationship and I can help and support you and your partner in changing negative behaviours into more positive ones. I can help you heal your relationship by teaching you how to communicate more clearly, a skill you may even be able to use in other areas of your life!

So please contact us now to arrange an appointment to discuss your specific needs.

With appointments generally available within a couple of weeks you will soon be happier again. Better still, I am available after hours, so neither of you will have to worry about taking time off from work!